Being Used for Profit and for Fun
©Mental Dimensions Humor Ezine
by Silly Putty
.:Relationship Humor:.
27 Jan 2006
Friday night? no date? no friends? Well why not get yourself out on the town and get used!
Yes, getting used, a favored pasttime of lonely suckers the world round. From the time the first female species crawled out of the primordial ooze, and demanded that the male take her to the salon to get her head molecules permed, women have been using us men.
Don't try to fight your urges to take out home loans and pawn grandma's jewelry, it's a perfectly natural reaction when any red blooded man sees some "fly booty." Try having fun with your disability -- see how much you can spend in one day, while getting the least amount of affection in return.
On the slim chance that a user turns out actually liking you, look her straight in the face and tell her you're an alien from the planet Mars... a gay alien, who likes other gay aliens; tell her you're not ready for the torture that an actual relationship involves, tell her those "feelings" and "quality time" just get in the way of you spending all your money on her.
If you ever feel the need to reform, try taking up a healthier addiction, such as alcoholism.
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